Parking lots

I ran across a quote the other day, which really resonated with me.  The author Harriet Mears said, “It’s difficult to steer a parked car, so get moving.”  It made me think about how I was approaching my work and how diligent I’d been.  I have to admit I wasn’t the most disciplined in my undertakings and if I was being kind to myself, had to also admit I had much room for improvement.  So I started asking at the end of each day, “what have to done today to earn money?”  At first I didn’t use the word money, but instead said, “…earn something”.   But then I realized this wasn’t specific enough.  If I wasn’t more specific I could earn respect or points or karma.  All worthy in-and-of-themselves.  But the yardstick we often measure our success by is a financial one and since the bank does like to have its mortgage paid on time with a check that will clear, this is the yardstick I am using for the moment.

A funny thing started happening.  I goofed off less, wasted less time reading email or online following bunny trails going nowhere or on message boards doing the virtual water cooler thingy.  I started holding myself more accountable.  I have an accountability person I report to weekly but sometimes I view this in a screwy way.  Like my friend, who is so kind to be there for me, is a parent or a teacher whom I have to report to.  And I’ve really never been good with those in authority.  I have the unsatifactories on the report cards to prove it.  Anywho, because I shifted the responsibility to someone else, I wasn’t holding myself accountable.  I wasn’t buying into my own progress and eventual success.  Now how screwy is that?  But by simply asking myself a simple 8 word question, I got my a—-er, car, out of park and started moving forward.  And I started making some progress.  It’s miniscule at the moment, but the ground is starting to feel a bit more solid underneath.

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